I hear ya.
You know what? I was thinking as I was brushing my teeth last night (I get bored doing this and my mind tends to wander) that I think the reason people can’t understand how you really feel about Grace is because for most people it’s a bit like me.
Like…when I was 20 years old I was completely obsessed with Kate Bush. (have you heard of her? 70s and 80s English singer? She appears kinda weird but is actually really nice and normal. People like Tori Amos say she inspired them and stuff) and this lasted until I was about 26, when slowly the obsession began to wane and Stevie Nicks took over. I was totally obsessed with her for years. It was easier in a way to be obsessed with Stevie as opposed to Kate because Kate hadn’t released any new albums and didn’t do anything like tour or do many interviews and stuff, so there wasn’t a lot to “feed” my obsession. But Stevie came here twice in the time I was obsessed. We saw Fleetwood Mac live in 2004 in Brisbane and then Stevie came out for her solo tour in 2006 and we saw her twice then. AMAZING. I still love her SO much, but it’s less of an obsession now. She’s sort of my second best person apart from Grace. Grace is now my obsession.
But you know what, when I first began to feel this for Grace, in April 2007, I fully expected it not to last that long. I was still obsessed with Stevie and was longing for her to come back so I could re-live my “Stevie week” of the year before when she was here in concert. (I took the whole week off work cause her Brisbane concert was on Monday and we went up there during the day and then stayed overnight and went to the fantastic concert, and then went back home the next day, and then on the Wednesday she did the second concert we went to, which was only a 10 minute walk away from our house, so we went for dinner, then we were early so sat on the boardwalk on the beach and stared at the stars and the dark ocean, and then wandered over to the concert hall place and the concert was even more amazing than it was the other night, and then we waited outside the hall for 40 minutes after to try and see her. There were a few others there waiting with us, and she did come out but didn’t stop. She waved and blew kisses as she walked out and then into the car waiting, and kept waving and kissing as they drove her away. Ah, magical. Lol. I didn’t want to spoil my Stevie-ness by going to work the next day and it seemed pointless to go just for Friday, so I had the whole week off. After the concert I was so emotional and overwhelmed I was crying.)
Anyway! So when Grace came on the scene last year, I for some reason thought she’d just be a temporary thing and Stevie would return. But no. As I said, I love Stevie and always will, but Grace is it.
However, for me, I am sort of aware that at some stage in the coming years my obsession for Grace may wane too, and someone else will replace her. Or my love for Stevie will rise again to the top and Grace will be second. You know? This is me. I accept it.
And I think most people may feel this way too, and so can’t understand that you are different.
God, I’ve babbled on about nothing, haven’t I!? Lol
CD, I wanted to say thank you so much for all the photos you’ve been sending to me of Grace. I realised this morning (as I was brushing my teeth actually) that I hadn’t said thank you or anything! So thank you for that. I love them.